F.I.N.A.L.S

Final exams are finally here...huhuhu...penat2 and berdebar2 sume orang...insyaAllah berkat usaha kita yang berpatutan...tawakkal kita akan membuahkan hasil...Allah kan Maha Pengasih dan Maha Adil ^_^....humm...saje nak share satu doa...

Ya Allah ya tuhanku...

Jika sesuatu perkara itu adalah terbaik buat diriku, agamaku, masa depanku, kehidupan dunia akhiratku dan membawaku lebih dekat kepadaMu, permudahkanlah perkara itu untukku, hampirkanlah perkara itu padaku, bukakanlah hatiku pada perkara itu...

dan Jika sesuatu perkara itu adalah buruk untuk diriku, agamaku, masa depanku, kehidupan dunia akhiratku dan menjauhkan diriku dari mengingatiMu, menjauhkan aku dariMu, jauhkanlah aku dari perkara itu, lindungilah dan peliharakanlah aku dari perkara itu, dan tutupkanlah pintu hatiku dari perkara itu....

amiiin....

doa nih bagus kalau kita tak berkesempatan untuk solat istikharah..and solat istikharah bukanlah semata2 untuk hal2 kawen jer..but for all matters in our lives involving making decisions....which mcm hari2 jer ade kee..so...klu diamalkan slalu..insyaAllah keputusan yang kita buat sehari2an adalah yang terbaik dan membawa kita lebih dekat kepada Allah

good luck everyone for the finals!...usaha dulu pulun2..then kite tawakkal eyhh..jangan give up awal2 lagi...^_^V

wallahua'lam~

Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan

I came across this pantun while surfing the internet....kind of interesting to read and to ponder on...hehehe...

10 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Bertemasya di Pantai Sri Pengkalan
Satu kena rogol beramai-ramai
Tinggal lagi Sembilan.

9 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Berpesta seks - video lucah di apartmen
Satu sempat dicekup pencegah maksiat
Tinggal lagi lapan.

8 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Pergi ke konsert Jom Heboh
Satu hilang ikut jantan
Tinggal lagi tujuh.

7 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Jadi GRO di Kelab Nilam
Satu dibawa pulang oleh pelanggan dan dibunuh
Tinggal lagi enam.

6 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Berpesta arak dan karaoke di kota
Satu terus jadi pelacur
Tinggal lagi lima.

5 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Satu disuruh seludup dadah dan ditangkap
Tinggal lagi empat.

4 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Bercinta dengan Mat Hitam Uganda
Satu sudah murtad hendak kahwin
Tinggal lagi tiga.

3 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Terjebak dengan kumpulan bohsia
Satu ditangkap bunuh bayinya
Tinggal lagi dua.

2 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Jadi Minah Rempit bersama Mat Kutu
Satu mati eksiden ketika lumba haram
Tinggal lagi satu.

1 Puteri Tak Dilindungi Bulan
Sangat-sangat susah hati
Termenung-menung seorang diri
Bagai ayam mabuk tahi
Rasa hidup sunyi sepi
Berkurung dalam bilik setiap hari
Ibu bapa tak ambil peduli sibuk ke sana sini
Lalu terjun dari pangsapuri
Langsung diapun mati

-Dr Fatimah Busu

got the picture? ^_^

terhanyut atau MENGhanyutkan diri?

semakin hanyut diri nie dengan hal-hal yang tak berpatutan...kenape sampai begini?

ape jadi pada diri yang dulu...yang walaupun tidak se-carefree begini...tapi lebih tenang and lebih bahagia...kenape tidak boleh begitu semula?

berulang kali mencuba berjalan di atas jalan yang lurus...tapi tak sampai selangkah diri ini jatuh jauuuh ...and terpesong lagi....memohon lagi pada Pencipta...bawalah diri in kepadaNya...dipermudahkan menghampiriNya...mendampingiNya...tapi....akhirnya..sendir juga yang memalingkan muka dari Yang Maha Pengasih dan Pengampun itu....bagaimanalah begitu?

yang sesat ditunjuk jalan..tapi kembali menyesatkan diri....sampai bila pon tidak jumpa jalan keluar dan tidak akan sampai ke destinasinya....mahu buat macamana?

life jacket dah dihulurkan dari pelbagai arah....tepi, depan, belakang...tapi..life jacket tuh hanyalah di tatap dan dipegang hujung2...mane nk membantu orang yang sedang hanyut...bukannye tak mampu menyarungkan life jacket tu sendiri...tapi kedegilan dan kurangnya yakin menyebabkan diri ini hanya memandang sahaja life jacket itu....ntah bila mahu betul2 disarung...mungkin bila sudah sampai dihujung air terjun atau curam yang dalam baru mahu disarung...na'uzubillah....

wahai orang yang hanyut, BANGKITLAH...BERJUANGLAH...BERKORBANLAH

teringin begini..tapi tidak mampu...rendah sungguh rasenyer

Pernah seketika dulu saya rasa saya tak berguna..
Masa dalam kelas kawan-kawan semua tak suka..
Saya nak 'join', kawan kata saya menyibuk..
Ada pula yang kate saya kuat emo..
Sikit-sikit nak marah..
Padahal sebenarnye saya nak tegur mereka buat bising masa belajar..

Lepas tu saya cuba buat lawak
kononnya nak tarik perhatian orang lain
saya paling gembira bila ada orang gelak bila dengar lawak saya
terutamanya pelajar-pelajar perempuan..
Budak-budak lelaki semua kata saya 'mat capub'(cari publisiti)..
tapi saya tak kesah..
asalkan ada yang terhibur..

Tapi saya tetap merasakan kekosongan..
Memang lumrah manusia..
Seoarang lelaki akan tertarik kepada wanita
Macam itulah yang saya rasa..
Saya tengok kawan-kawan dah ada yang 'couple'..
Di dorm sms awek sampai pagi..
ada yang call awek sampai satu malam boleh habis 10 ringgit..

Saya mula berfikir..
"Adakah aku perlu BERCINTA?"
Dengan menggunakan akal seorang pelajar tingkatan 4 itu..
saya pun mula menanam tekad untuk ber'couple'. .
Dan masa itulah saya kenal awak..
saya rase saya dah jumpa orang yang paling penting dalam hidup saya..

Mula-mula awak jual mahal..
Tapi saya tak kisah..nak beli gak..
akhirnya, dipendekkan cerita..
saya pun mulalah BERCINTA..

Masa bercinta,memang saya sangat-sangat bersemangat
Apa orang kata..'ALL OUT'lah..
haha..
Saya selalu call awak,awak pun selalu call saya..
'gayut' malam-malam. .kadang-kadang saya pun habis RM10 satu malam..
Tetapi segala PENGORBANAN yg dilakukan masa ber'couple' tu..
Tidak terasa pun kehilangannya. .

Mase bercinta memang indah..
Semuanya indah..
Sikit-sikit gurau-gurau
Sikit-sikit gelak-gelak
kalau merajuk men pujuk2..
kalau 'birthday' kita sambut sama-sama..

Untuk diri ini,terasa amat bahagia..
Sebab masa itulah terasa diri ini dihargai..
Saya pernah terikir..
Biarlah kawan-kawan saya tu pandang saya semacam,
kata saya macam-macam. .
Asalkan awak memahami saya..

Satu hari saya dengar ceramah..
Alhamdulillah. .
Dalam ceramah tu saya sedar,saya banyak buat dosa
dan saya kena brubah..
Hidup saya mesti selari dengan Islam..
Saya kena jadi baik..
Sebab memang itu fitrah manusia..mengingina kan kebaikan..
semua orang nak masuk syurga kan?

Sejak dari saat itu saya mula rapatkan diri dengan masjid..
Rapatkan diri dengan Al-Quran..
Selalu solat jemaah awal waktu..
Selalu dengar tazkirah..

Saya beli terjemahan Quran, sebab nak tadabbur Quran
Saya beli dua, satu untuk saya, satu untuk awak,
Saya taknak jadi baik seorang diri..
jadi saya ajak awak sekali..
Saya ajak awak baca Al-Quran..
saya kejut awk bangun subuh..(calling)
saya ajak awak saling beri tazkirah..

Mula-mula awak terkejut dengan perubahan saya..
Awak ingat saya dah nak jadi alim, nak brenti couple.
Saya kata,kita bukan buat benda yang salah..
bercinta kerana Allah..
Kita couple tak macam orang lain..
Orang lain couple 'jiwang-jiwang' je..
ade yang siap wat mksiat lg..
pegang-pegang tangan dan macam-macam lagi..
Tapi kita couple baik-baik..
Jaga batas-batas syara'..
Tak guna ayat jiwang-jiwang
janji taknak jumpa, takut berlaku maksiat..
cuma sms dan call je..

Dan awk terima perubahan saya itu..
Saya pun banyak nasihat awak..
Awk pun terima..
Walaupun kadang-kadang awak merajuk sebab teguran saya tu
Tapi saya faham, perubahan memerlukan masa..
Dan akhirnya saya rasa..
Hubungan kita semakin diredahai..
Saya salu doa supaya kita akan kekal sampai ke gerbang perkahwinan. .


Dalam proses perubahan saya,
Saya mula menyedari bahawa berdakwah itu wajib..
Kita kena menyampaikan kepada orang tentang kebenaran.
Kalau kita tidak berdakwah..
kita akan dipertanggungjawabk an oleh Allah di akhirat kelak.
sesuai dgn firmanNya dlm surah Al-A'raf,
surah ke 7,ayat ke 164:

Dan (ingatlah) ketika suatu umat di
antara mereka berkata: "Mengapa kamu
menasihati kaum yang Allah akan
membinasakan mereka atau mengazab mereka
dengan azab yang amat keras?" Mereka
menjawab: "Agar kami mempunyai alasan
(pelepas tanggung jawab) kepada Tuhanmu,
dan supaya mereka bertakwa".

Lepas tu saya mulalah beri tazkirah pada kawan-kawan dan adik-adik
Tegur mereka apa sahaja yang silap..
Saya tak boleh tahan bila tengok orang buat salah/dose..
Saya mesti nak tegur.
Selemah2 iman tegur dengan hati, oleh sebab saya nak jadi orang kuat iman..
Ape lagi..tegur je la depan-depan. .huhu~~

Lepas tu, satu masa..
saya terbaca pasal couple..

"COUPLE HARAM"

Saya tak percaya..
tapi bila baca detail-detail yang dia bagi..
macam betul pulak..
huhu~~
tapi biasala..
kalau kita suka satu benda tu..
kita tetap akan cari alasan untuk 'membenarkan' pendapat kita..

Saya pun buat tak tahu pasal benda tu..
dan teruskan saja hubungan kita..
kita tak buat maksiat..
Kita jalan-jalan pegang tangan..
tak jiwang-jiwang. .
Cuma saling ambil berat..
Tanya khabar..
Borak-borak. .
Siap bagi tzkirah lagi..
Apa yang haramnya dengan benda ni?
Tak kisahlah..

Masa terus berlalu...


Masa ni dah nak dekat Trial SPM..
lagi tiga minggu sebelum trial..
dalam masa tu, saya memang rajin study dengan kawan..
buat study group
Pada masa yang sama, bagi tazkirah..

Ada yang terima..
ada juga yang buat tak tahu
Kadang-kadang bila tegur..
saya kena marah pula..
macam-macamlah alasannya
ada kata saya tegur tak berhikmah..
ada yang kata saya menunjuk-nunjuk je..
Tapi tak kisah..
saya ada tempat mengadu..
huhu~~


Suatu masa..
ketika sedang mentadabbur Al-Quran seorang diri..
saya terjumpa ayat ini..

Mengapa kamu suruh orang lain
(mengerjakan) kebajikan, sedang kamu
melupakan diri (kewajiban) mu sendiri,
padahal kamu membaca Al Kitab (Taurat)?
Maka tidakkah kamu berfikir?
(Al-Baqarah, ayat 44)

Saya pun terfikir..

"Selama ini aku asyik tegur orang je.
Tapi aku sendiri masih banyak kekurangan,
Cepat marah, suka buang masa,
ade gak dosa-dosa yang masih dilakukan..
Macam mana ya?"

Lepas tu terjumpa pula ayat ini..

Dan janganlah kamu campur adukkan yang
hak dengan yang batil dan janganlah kamu
sembunyikan yang hak itu, sedang kamu
mengetahui.
(Al-Baqarah ayat 42)

Tiba-tiba saya terfikir satu keritikan kawan..

"Alah kau tu..cakap je berapi..gaya alim,tapi couple gak..sama aje kau
dengan kami..tegur orang konon.."

Berfikir sejenak..
Sebenarnye ber'couple' ni boleh ke tidak?
Adakah selama ini saya hanya menganggap ia boleh?
Habis tu, kenapa saya rasa malu bila mak dan ayah
tahu saya selalu berhubung dengan perempuan?
Dan terkadang saya rasa serba salah?

Macam-macam yang saya fikir..

Dipendekkan cerita lagi sekali..
saya ke Pulau Pinang untuk mengikuti satu seminar dkwh..
Saya harap dengan seminar ni kefahaman saya mengenai dakwah akan lebih mantap..

Dalam perjalanan ke seminar tu..
saya masih sms lagi dengan awak dalam bas..
sempat lagi pesan-pesan supaya jangan lupa baca Al-Quran hari ini, solat awal waktu..
Dalam fikiran saya..
"Ni kira dakwah juga..saling ingat-mengingati. ."



******



Majlis malam itu berakhir dengan sesi ta'aruf,
pukul 10 semua orang dah bebas untuk aktiviti sendiri
Lagipun kami semua penat..
takkan nak panjang-panjangkan program sampai tengah malam..
pihak penganjur pun faham..

Tiba-tiba saya tergerak hati untuk bertanya dengan fasilitator yang ada di situ..
Saya rasa inilah masa terbaik untuk tanya pendapat dia tentang couple.
Tapi saya tragak-agak. .
"Kalaulah betul couple tu salah..habis tu,nak
buat macam mana? Aku kena clash ke?
Alah,buat apa fikir macam tu..tanya je la. Kalau
tak buat salah, apa nak ditakutkan?"

Lalu saya menghampiri 'Brother' fasilitator tu..
Masa tu dia tengah membelek-belek terjemahan Al-Qurannya seorang diri.

"Assalamualaikum, bang, saya nak tanya sikit
boleh?"

"Em,boleh..duduklah . Nta nak tanya apa?"

"Er..macam ni,sebelum saya terlibat dengan dakwah ni, saya ada kenal seorang
kawan ni, perempuan la. Tapi bukanla setakat kawan biasa..rapat gak la. Bukan rapat biasa,tapi rapatla.."

"Bercinta ke?"

Saya malu nak cakap yang saya couple. Nanti apa pula brother tu kate..mesti dia marah nnt. Saya pun angguk. Lepas tu saya tanya..

"Sebenarnya. .couple ni boleh ke tak bang?"

"Akhi, memang fitrah manusia, lelaki akan tertarik kepada perempuan, begitu juga perempuan akan tertarik kepada lelaki. Tapi dalam Islam, perasaan itu perlu dikawal dan ada batasnya. Pergaulan perlu dijaga. Allah firman dalam surah Al-Isra', surah ke 17, dalam ayat yg ke 32:
Dan janganlah kamu mendekati zina; sesungguhnya zina itu adalah suatu perbuatan yang keji dan suatu jalan yang buruk."

"Tapi bang,saya tak nampak pun yang kami ni menghampiri zina. Niat kami baik. Saya dah cuba sedaya upaya mengawal perhubungan kami. Sms pun takdelah jiwang-jiwang, selalu bagi tazkirah lagi. Kami selang-selang bagi, hari ni saya, esok dia."

Saya tak mahu mengalah.

"Memang betul niat nta baik. Tapi ingat, niat tak pernah menghalalkan cara. Yang batil tetap sahaja batil, yang haq tetap haq. Cuba tengok ayat ni."
Sambil brother tu bukak Al-Quran dia, dan tunjuk pada saya ayat ini:
Dan (juga) kaum Ad dan Tsamud, dan sungguh telah nyata bagi kamu (kehancuran mereka) dari (puing-puing) tempat tinggal mereka. Dan setan menjadikan mereka memandang baik
perbuatan-perbuatan mereka, lalu ia menghalangi mereka dari jalan (Allah), sedangkan mereka adalah orang-orang yang berpandangan tajam.
(Surah Al-Anakabut, Surah 29, ayat 38)

"Akhi, kalau nta paham ayat ni, sebenarnya apa yang berlaku pada nta ialah, setan telah buat nta pandang indah benda buruk yang nta lakukan. Walaupun nta berpandangan tajam, maksudnya nta berilmu tinggi. Memang pada mulanya niat nta baik, tapi ingat, syaitan itu sangat licik. Dia akan sedaya upaya buat nta terjerumus ke dalam kemaksiatan. Lagipun, takkanlah sepanjang masa nta sms dengan dia, nta ingat Allah. Mesti ada masanya nta hanya melayan perasaan dengan dia, kan?"

Betul juga katanya. Lepas tu saya kata, "Tapi bang, saya dah janji dengan dia taknak jumpa lg. Sebab saya tahu kalau berjumpa nanti banyak bahayanya. Dan dia pun setuju. Kami sama-sama menjaga diri. Takkanlah ia boleh membawa kepada zina juga bang?"

"Em, betul, nta dah janji taknak jumpa dengan dia lagi. Nta dah dapat

elakkan zina mata, zina tangan, zina kaki. kalau nta janji taknak call die pula, nta dapat elak zina telinga dan zina lidah. Tapi akh..masih ada zina yang tetap nta tak dapat elak apabila bercouple.."

"Zina hati?" Saya menduga.

"Betul, zina hati. Semua inilah yang Rasulullah jelaskan dalam hadithnya tentang bagaimana menghampiri zina tu. Nta boleh 'check' dalam Riyadahus Solihin, bawah bab larangan melihat wanita. Rasulullah bersabda, mata boleh berzina dgn melihat, lidah boleh berzina dengan bercakap, tangan boleh berzina dengan berpegangan. Kaki boleh berzina dengan berjalan ke arah tempat maksiat. Hati pula boleh berzina dgn merindui, mengingati dan membayangi si dia. Hakikatnye, macam mana pun nta buat, nta tetap tak dapat lari daripada zina hati."

Saya terdiam..kelu. Tak tahu apa nak dikata. Semua yang brother tu kata tiada yang salahnya. Kemudian dia sambung..

"Ana dulu pun couple gak. Lagi lama daripada nta. Sejak sekolah sampai dah masuk U, dekat nak gred. Tapi bila ana sedar apa yang ana buat ni salah, ana trus tinggalkan. Ana siap dah fikir, dialah bakal isteri ana, yang akan jadi ibu kepada anak-anak ana. Kalau nak diikutkan lagi besar masalah ana daripada nta."

"Saya risau la bang. Nanti apa kawan-kawan dia kata. Dulu saya selalu minta tolong mereka untuk rapat dengan dia. Mesti nanti mereka semua tak puas hati dengan saya. Dan dia sendiri pula, saya takut apa-apa akan jadi pada dia kalau dia tak dapat terima keputusan ni. Sebab kami dah rapat sgt."

Masa tu saya dah mula sebak. Malu betul. Menangis depan brother tu cerita pasal benda ni. Nasib baik tak ada org lain masa tu. Brother tu jwb..

"Kalau kawan-kawan dia tak puas hati pun, mereka boleh buat apa? Paling teruk pun, mereka akan mengata di belakang nta. Nta tak kurang sikit pun. Lagipun, dalam berdakwah ni, kita nak cari redha Allah, biarlah orang nak kata apa-apa sekali pun, yang penting redha Allah. Kalau Allah tak redha, semuanya dah tak bermakna lagi."

Saya trdiam lagi.

"Pasal die pula, cube nta fikir dari sudut positif, mungkin dia akan terima keputusan nta scara matang. Mungkin dia juga akan buat keputusan untuk tidak lagi bercouple. Ana yakin, die takkan buat apa-apa perkara bodoh. Kalau die buat sekalipun, itu bukan tagguungjawab nta, apa yang nta nak buat tu betul, meninggalkan maksiat. Semua orang akan tanggung balasan atas perbuatannya sndiri."

Saya dah tak dapat tahan lagi. Masa itu saya menangis, saya dah sdar yang saya kena berhenti couple. Dah jelas sekarang, couple tu haram.

"Jadi apa saya nak buat bang?"

"Ana dulu, hantar satu sms je kat dia. Ana terangkan pada dia hubungan yang dibina itu salah. Minta maaf, kita berakhir di sini. Tolong jangan cari saya lagi. Lepas itu ana terus tukar nombor. Ana tak hubungi dia langsung lepas tu."

"Maksudnya, saya tak boleh hubungi dia lagi ke? Tapi bang, saya ade juga kawan perempuan lain, boleh pula saya hubungi mereka?"

"Dengan dia ni lain. Nta dah pernah ada 'sejarah' dengan dia. Tapi, kalau nanti ditaqdirkan nta satu universiti dengan dia, satu kuliah, lepas tu kena pula buat group discussion, masa tu nta hanya layan dia hanya sebagai group discussion partner."

Tiba-tiba saya terfikir..

"Dia ni nak suruh aku clash malam ni gak ke? Sekarang gak? Takkanlah awal sangat?"

Saya cakap..

"Saya rasa saya belum ade kekuatan la bang. Boleh tak saya tunggu sampai saya ada kekuatan, baru saya tiggalkan benda ni?"

Saya ingat nak lari la. Lalu dia jawab..

"Akh, nta kena ingat. Kekuatan itu tidak boleh ditunggu, tapi ia perlu dibina. Allah tidak akan mengubah keadaan sesuatu kaum sehingga kaum itu mengubah keadaannya sendiri. Nta boleh rujuk surah Ar-Ra'du,surah ke-13,ayat 11. Lagipun, nta nak tuggu sampai bila baru nak tinggalkan couple ni..abang-abang fasilitator ni pun ramai yang pernah couple, bila masuk dakwah, mereka tiggalkan."

Alamak...tak boleh lari lagilah nampaknye..saya rasa macam brother ni paksa saya clash masa tu juga.

"Semuanya dah jelas rasanya..Nampaknya saya kena tiggalkanla benda ni gak ye. Macam tak larat rasanya nak tekan button handphone ni. Rasa tak sanggup."

"Kalau tak sanggup mari ana tolong tekankan."

"Eh, tak apalah bang. Biar saya taip sendiri."

Teragak-agak saya nak taip masa tu. Tapi saya gagahkn juga diri..

"Semuanya dah jelas..buat apa aku tangguh-tangguh lagi. Takut nanti hidayah ni Allah tarik, susah pula nak tinggalkan. Kan aku selalu doa supaya dijauhkan dari maksiat..jadi rasanya, inilah masanya.."


Lalu perlahan-lahan saya taip sms tu..

"Assalamualaikum. .Sebenarnya selama ini hubungan kita salah di sisi Islam. Saya ingat dengan mengubah cara pergaulan kita, ia dah dibolehkan, tapi sebenarnya ia tetap berdosa. Saya harap awak akan istiqamah meneruskan perubahan yang awak dah buat, kerana Allah. Saya minta maaf atas segala yang dah berlaku. Kalau ada jodoh insya-Allah, akan bertemu juga. Assalamualaikum. ."

Berat betul nak hantar sms tu kat awk. Saya masih tak mampu nak ucap selamat tiggal. Sebab tu dalam sms tu saya hanya akhirkan dengan ucapan salam. Lepas beberapa ketika..saya tekan juga button [send].

Lepas tu tertera di skrin..

[SENDING..]

[MESSAGE SENT]

Masa tu saya rasa macam separuh hidup saya dah hilang. Macam tak percaya..saya dah hantar 1 sms, dan clash dengan awak..

"Terima kasih bang.."

"Takpe, dah tanggungjawab. ."

Malam tu saya saya tidur dengan linangan air mata..tak sangka..mmg tak disangka..Saya memang tak pernah terfikir untuk clash, tapi itulah yang terbaik untuk kita sbenarnya..
Tiba-tiba saya teringat ayat Allah..surah Al-Baqarah,ayat 216..

Diwajibkan atas kamu berperang, padahal berperang itu adalah sesuatu yang kamu benci. Boleh jadi kamu membenci sesuatu, padahal ia amat baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi (pula) kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal ia amat buruk bagimu; Allah mengetahui, sedang kamu tidak mengetahui.



*******



Masa terus berlalu.. Saya terus sibukkan diri dengan kerja-kerja lain. Dalam usaha nak lupekan awk, bukan senang,tapi saya terus cuba. Saya selalu bagi tazkirah, ingatkan orang.
Saya bagi ta'lim di msjid, terangkan pada orang, couple haram, tunjuk segala dalil.. Macam-macam yang berlaku..ada kritikan..ade gk yg stuju..tapi tak kisahlah semua tu..

Tiba-tiba satu pagi ni, dapat sms daripada awak..awak bagi gambar bunga..bawah tu ada ayat..

"Seindah gubahan pertama.."

Saya rasa awak masih tak dapat lupakan saya. Saya pun fikir.."Kena tegaskan rasanya". Lepas tu saya hantarlah sms ni. Dan rasanya itulah yg terakhir..

"Tiada yang lebih indah daripada mendapat keredahaan ilahi..seindah manapun gubahan pertama tu, selagi tak mendapat keredahaanNya, tetap tiada gunanya..

Assalamualaikum. .saya tahu, dulu saya cakap, kalau ada jodoh, insya-Allah akan bertemu juga. Tapi saya taknak awak tunggu. Lupakan saya. Biar Allah yang menentukan.. Lagi satu,

Jangan cari cinta manusia,
ia penuh dengan penipuan,
kekecewaan,
dan tak kekal..

Tapi carilah cinta Allah..
tiada penipuan,
tidakkan pernah mengecewakan
itulah cinta abadi..
Cinta yang diredahai..

-Yang Terakhir- "

[SEND]

[SENDING..]

[MESSAGE SENT]

Saya dah buat keputusan.
Saya pasti apa yang saya buat ni betul.
Saya yakin, Allah akan sediakan yang terbaik untuk saya.
Saya takkan berpatah balik..

Takkan..buat selama-lamanya.

absent-ness

Sorry for the very long silence...sorry to my friends..asek jer kne suruh update baru nk update kan?...huhu...it had been more than a month! It's not that I don't have anything to write about..is it as this...I kind of compose my entry in my head when there is something to say..but later on in the day I'll flush my thoughts away...by the time I'm free to write...nada..nothing..emptiness is the only thing filling my head...hahaha (giler drama) but...REALLY...I'm not as inspired as my friends are kot..=D

So...what happened? A LOT. My last entry was about the first day of Ramadhan ..So..what I have to say about what happened a month and a half later are these..

# My Ramadhan this year was not one of the best...kelemahan diri sendri mengatasi rase ingin berubah dan berjuang itu...haihhh laaa...


# My Eid was mostly sad than fun. Heh...maybe sebab puase tak best jugak kot kan? Sold my our car on the first day of raya..smpi today pon tak setel2 lagi hal kete tuh..


# Went to Chicago for Fall Break..spent all four days there...aaaaaa..I LIKE IT A LOT..thanks to our very very
kind and loving host Akak Zed Diana..thanks! Went shopping in downtown Chicago and also Outlet..hehe...bought me a BIG and very useful handbag and a pair of black shoes with HEELS ^_^ (finally dapat gak kasut yang sesuai...)

# Went to DC for Raya celebration at the embassy...ske ske ske..dapat roadtrip ^_^ it was funnn and dapat amek gamba lawa juge...So...I'm happy ^_^


I guess those are the eventful things in my life for the past month, besides all the usuals-studying, homework yang menggunung, lab reports yang mcm nk bunuh orang, quizzes and exams..done with one test this morning..Transport...huhu...it was good...I think I did okay..insyaAllah the result is okay too... next week 2 more exams and the week after one last exam...AND then THANKSGIVING BREAK..yoohoo...am looking forward for it....what to do? still thinking..any ideas??...I might end up staying here in Vandy- studying...preparing for the finals =P...NO kidding..rite...I'll update later...tata~!

P/S: dah ade iPod nano sekarang...sukeee~ :D

With Arms Wide Open...

Alhamdulillah...Ramadhan is here and I'm still here for another wonderful month insyaAllah with Ramadhan ^_^

Last night was the first night of Tarawih. Went to ICN with the sisters...*rase besyukur sangat sbb still ade kesempatan untuk beramal lagi dalam bulan mulia nih*...I was so overwhelmed, suke sangat Ramadhan * yeeeeeeeeeee *

Unfortunately for me, first day of breaking fast is at work *=( apelaa naseb* hehe...but I guess I'm much luckier than other people...people who's thinking what to eat? where to get the food? what about tomorrow? what will their children have?....
Oh Allah, bless those people and grant upon them your plenty sustenance and make us among the pious and righteous servants...Amin~

Here is a hadith to ponder on, since our theme is Ramadhan (^_^),

Narrated Abu Huraira:
Allah's Apostle said, "When the month of Ramadan starts, the gates of the heaven are opened and the gates of Hell are closed and the devils are chained."

-Sahih Bukhari, Volume 3, Book 31, Number 123:

Ahlan Wasahlan Ya Ramadhan...

Without realizing it, my favorite month of the year is just by the corner. Yup! Ramadhan is just next week insyaAllah.....next Thursday according to the calendar, we'll see how it goes.

(rase cam tulis essay laa plak) Why I love Ramadhan so much? Sadly and shamefully to say, it is the only month that I am able to make myself practice good deeds and ibadah that I set my goals on ... alhamdulillah Allah has given me chance to do so for the past 10 years of my fasting-life. What I wish for this time around is that I can achieve more and do more in this month and here is the important part, I hope I can stay istiqamah forever, not just in the month of Ramadhan...

Although Ramadhan is only a week a way, there is still no absolute promise that I'll be able to meet up with Ramadhan or even live through the month of Ramadhan. So, I don't want to wait for Ramadhan to come and only then start doing good things. Ramadhan is not the reason to our ibadah, our love towards Allah is. And Allah is always here, not only in Ramadhan....

So I say,stop holding up and let all of us collect our might, and start exercising good behaviors and let go of our bad habits ...insyaAllah

Wallahua'lam~

big PICTURE

I'm already in my Junior year in college...yesssnesss!! *jumping jumping*...huhu...meaning I'll be done with college life in 1 year plus plus *grinnnn* but it also means that heavier loads of materials to be learned *BIG sigh*

As I was walking..or rather, hurrying (bangun lewat maaa =p) to class this morning, I was complaining to myself about my first class for today, why doesn't the professor explain to us about the concepts and THEN let us answer the question...but then again when I re-think about it, all the concepts and applications involved was learned in previous classes and semesters before, it is actually repeating the same concepts each and every time, the only thing that changes is the way we apply them and on what type of situation we apply them on...that's it. Sound simple rite?...huhuhu...but to actually be doing it, takes time and a LOT of thinking and discussing....

It turned out that things that I thought I learned before might be useless in the future, is actually what's important for me now...come again? I somewhat regret the way I take things for granted...



So..as a lesson for me and maybe some of you...in learning, everything is IMPORTANT...don't ASSUME that some things are best to be left out of the picture cause when you look at the big picture, you'll see the MISSING pieces ....

wallahua'lam~

Jaw Dropping Jump Roping

:: Apparently I had the title wrong =(...it's actually is jump roping instead of rope jumping...LOL (^_^) ::

I spent all evening watching videos on Youtube....something I haven't done for quite awhile...I need to stop now...my chair is getting hot and I need to get ready for things tonight..EAT!...hehehhe...^_^

Enjoy this video, ..want to share it with you

Father, Son and Holy Spirit

I was told that the concept of Trinity was never mentioned in neither the Old Testament or the New Testament, and when I did my searching on Wikipedia (where else rite? =D), I found this :
"Neither the Old Testament nor New Testament uses the term 'Trinity', though Trinitarians believe the concept is implicit in various biblical passages"

How can a very important foundation of a religion failed to be mention in their Holy Scripture anywhere? Weird huh...hard to register the fact into my mind...

But, try to ponder on this, the concept of Trinity-mentioned in the Holy Qur'an. How's that for a fact? IT'S TRUE! But, the Holy Qur'an REJECTS the concept of TRINITY. A very short and clear Surah mention about it.


Translation:

In the name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.
Say: He is Allah, the One! Allah,
the eternally Besought of all!
He begetteth not nor was begotten.
And there is none comparable unto Him.

and let's compare it to this (got it from Wiki again):
"In Christianity, the doctrine of the Trinity states that God is one being who exists, simultaneously and eternally, as a mutual indwelling of three persons: the Father, the Son (incarnate as Jesus of Nazareth), and the Holy Spirit."

And let's match them..

1. the Father - nor was begotten (has no father-not born)
2. the Son - He begetteth not (has no son-don't give birth)
3. The Holy Spirit - there is none comparable unto Him

Islam rejects all three claims specifically and clearly in just one short Surah..indeed this is a special Surah..Wallahua'lam

Distraction

My textbook is wide open in front of me...crying out for me to read it...huhu...sorry buku....why am I so lazy huh? I soo want to read and study but there are too many distractions around me...I once remember watching one episode of Malcolm in the Middle where Malcolm's eldest brother need to study to pass an examination that was soo important....but he was so easily distracted that he was forced to study in an empty room with nothing with him except for his textbook...but..to his delight, he was able to find a reason to distract him from studying, a strand of hair or a dust, I can't really remember....thank you Allah that I'm not thaatt baadly distracted...but still..I have to work on my focus skills...huhuhu...it'll be bad if you're talking to someone about something serious but you are distracted by a stain on their face or even the reflection of light on their teeth (happened to me) *grin*....unimportant things becomes the only thing that we can think of at that time...how much I hate it when that happens...prevent me from doing something smoothly and the way it should be...camane nihh? =(

I guess it all come back to how we perform and carry out our deeds and ibadah ...because everything is reflected from them rite?....In my prayers, maybe I did not put enough khusyuk in it...that is why I'm so easily distracted by other stuff when I'm trying to finish my chores and works...sounds logical? let us all think about this for a moment shall we?

A hadith to reflect on this...(tanak cakap blindly w/o any persandaran to agama)

"The first matter that the slave will be brought to account for on the Day of Judgment is the prayer. If it is sound, then the rest of his deeds will be sound. And if it is bad, then the rest of his deeds will be bad." [Recorded by al-Tabarani. According to al-Albani, it is sahih. Al-Albani, Sahih al-Jami, vol.1, p. 503.

Demi Masa

This Surah is among the shortest Surah in al-Quran. Surely, it is true that precious things come in small packages and that can be seen here in this surah....Allah reminds us about time...one thing that we always take for granted...even though at times we try really hard to treasure it...there will always come a time when we fail to really appreciate it... In this Surah, Allah swears by time... this shows how important time is..and then Allah proceed by saying 'Verily human being is at loss. Except for those who have faith and do righteous deeds and exhort one another to truth and exhort one another to patience'

See how beautiful the ayats of Allah swt is? First He remind us, so that we become aware, then He guide us, so that we are not lost and know what to do to bring ourselves closer to Him and gain His love. He is always here to guide us...He never leaves us ... when we feel lost, we can always come back to His words ... we recite it...and insyaAllah we'll find the way...

So, the short reminder here is that, in order to try our best not to fall into the category of people in loss, we must make sure that at every moment of our lives, we are in the state of iman, doing something good, at least once a day invite others to do good things, and remind them of something good...a simple question asking about their welfare is good enough..or blogging like this is good enough too *^_^* kot...klu ade orang bace laaa..hope it can be read and remind us about who we are and bring us back to Allah...insyaAllah~

Have we recite al-Quran today? Did we gave thanks to Allah for another day we are breathing on this earth? Did we think about our sins and ask Allah for forgiveness?
Know that Allah is always here for us...all we need to do is ask from Him...and insyaAllah...everything that is good for us in this world and Hereafter will become easier for us to achieve (ape punye ayat keling tunggang langgang laa nih...maaf...) ^_^V

Remember that Allah loves us ..it is us that need to learn to love Allah and need Allah's love...;P

wallahua'lam

Benefits of Solat

RE-reading my blog told me that I overwhelmed my entry...huhu...sorry aa eh...was too absorbed with the content..should have wrote it shorter and make it more meaningful I guess..instead of just plain long...

So..this time I'll try to make it shorter....insyaAllah, using my already existing notes from previous halaqah and also usrah...I'll try to share it with you guys..insyaAllah....

:: The Benefits of Solat ::

There are many benefits of solat of course, and if you Google it too you'll get a lot of feedback...and here is one of the many...may we become more aware of our prayers after this...

1. Fajr (Subuh)
# whoever prays Fajr for 40 consecutive days (in Jamaah), he is exempted from two things,
(i) from Hellfire
(ii) from hypocrisy

2. Zuhr
# Allah will protect from the 'wave of heat' in Mahsyar on the Day of Judgement and also from the Hellfire

3. 'Asr
# it is the time when Adam and Eve ate from the forbidden tree
# whoever prays 'Asr, Allah will forgives all his sins just like the day he was born

4. Maghrib
# Allah forgives the sins of Adam
# whoever prays with complete certainty (khusyu') and hope to Allah, any du'a after the
prayer with expectation of reward from Allah will be mustajab

5. Isya'
# the only known mandatory solat on all the prophets before the assigned wajib solats
# two benefits from this is :
(i) Allah forbid Hellfire from punishing this servant
(ii) Allah will grant him a light while he is crossing the Sirat al-Mustaqeem


The first deed that will be judge on the Day of Judgement is his solats. If the solat is good, then all the other deeds are good.And if the solat is bad, then all of his other deeds are ruined - HR Thabrani


wallahua'lam

Prayer (Du'a)

Every person in the world will come to a point in life, no matter if its the President of a country, a celebrity, even the richest person on earth, will come to a day that they will seek help or ask for guidance, to turn to something or someone asking for help, and the one resort that everyone turn to is a 'higher being', which for me, is only Allah SWT...no other than that..insyaAllah for every other Muslims too...

What causes me to bring up this topic is when listening to an online lecture, "Du'a, the Weapon of the Believers", and there are a lot more interesting lectures. So to explain all about the lecture here would be a tideous work to do...especially for a lazy bum like me (^_^) ...heeheee, so I will only share one part of the whole lecture, with the hope that it could attract people to listen to the whole thing.. yeah it's a long lecture..but the advantage here is that, we can here it whenever we feel like it and we can download it into our very 'canggih' mp3 player or the very cute iPod nano *wink wink* and listen to it on the way to class or while on a roadtrip...clever isn't it?...benefit our time better kaann?...hehe...new reason to buy one for me...*grin* . Anyways, coming back to the original topic, here is some of the excerpt from the lecture...

Why are some of our du'a is not accepted by Allah or not responded to? Well, first thing we have to note here is that, Allah respond to every du'a, each one of them, the only thing is, it might not be when and how we want it to be, but we have to faith in it. Reasons for this?

1. Allah is al-maalik, the king, we cannot question the wisdom of Allah, only Allah have the right to question us. Allah judges and decides for everything, no one has the right to demand anything more than what Allah want to give. And know that, Allah gives what is the best for His servants, because Allah love us.

2. Recognition of our status, as the servant of Allah, we have no power, even breathing itself, are we breathing on our own will? No, it is the wisdom of Allah that made us able to breathe and it is His mercy that we have air to breathe with. What more is there to say but only to realize how small and timid we are. That is why, for everything we want, we ask only from Allah and Allah alone can give us what we need when He permits it. Nothing is in our hand to decide. Allahuakbar! If Allah gives something to us, it is because of His wisdom and justice, and if He does not give it to us, that is also His wisdom and justice.

3. A type of test Allah bring upon us, to test our imaan and taqwa towards Him. Allah will test our patience, how do we react when we make du'a for a long time but Allah still haven't granted us with what we want or rather, when we ask for something but instead Allah give us something else that we hate. What would you feel if happens to you? Personally I think I will be sad in the first place, but remember this ayat and hold it close to you and insyaAllah it will help you throughout your ups and downs in life and make us be more tranquil with what Allah have in store for us.

" ... it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know"-Al Baqarah, 216

Be contended with what Allah gives you, verily, Allah's wisdom is perfect, and realized that what we ask for might not be beneficial for us in this world or hereafter, only Allah knows this, the long terms or short terms consequences. Trust in Allah, Allah is more merciful on us than our mother. We do trust our mothers rite? So trust Allah more. He is our creator, He knows what is the best for us because Allah love us. The choice of Allah is better than the choice of the servant.
And remember that, when Allah doesn't give you what you want, He is giving you something better...only that we can't see it just yet because of our weakness..so, trust Allah...

4. To increase our iman. Because only through trial and testing will be able to increase our iman and taqwa. It is just like working out at the gym, if we don't exercise our muscles and put it through a lot of work, it won't be strong and big and have the shape that we want it to be. So, it is the same with our imaan, we have to make it go through tests and trials to increase it The more difficult the trials and fitnah, the more the reward will be. If Allah loves a servant, He test him. This is to raise the rank of the servant. So if we are being tested, say alhamdulillah instead of complaining, but pour your heart to Allah, verily Allah is the best listener to His servant and Allah love it when we turn to Him for everything, because it shows how much we acknowledge the relationship of a servant and his Creator.

5. Make us take a moment away from our actions, contemplate our behavior, every good ones and bad ones, ponder upon our lives, and make us think about our relationship with Allah SWT. Only when our du'a is not responded to, will we start to think over our actions. "Why is this happening to me?..What did I do to deserve this?"I don't think that a person that obtain all that he wished for and get all that he asked for will ever stop and ask such question and or even stop to thank Allah for it. Mostly because we are getting carried away with our fleeting happiness. So, when a du'a is delayed from respond, this is the best time to improve ourself and be a better servant, tazkiyyah, strengthen the feeling of 'pergantungan pada Allah', giving up our sins and doing more good deeds become easier for us to do because we know that all of this can increase the chances for our du'a to be asnwered..insyaAllah...

6. The du'a might have been responded to, only we did not realize it. We are narrow minded; we only look at what we want and discard from our mind all of the other bigger and better blessings around us. It is possible that Allah has given us things that are way better than what we ask for, but we are too blind to see and appreciate them. Nau'zubillah...

A lot have been said and a lot more is left to be discovered, so why not try to listen to the whole lecture? As a conclusion (mcm essay laa plak kan??), try this;- stop and question ourselves for every du'a..Have I perfected this du'a? Am I asking only for the benefits of the world and leaving out the hereafter? Am I fulfilling the ettiquete of a du'a? Am I doing something that could prevent my du'a from being accepted?

Turn to Allah for everything, insyaAllah life will be much better with tranquility and contentment together with redha from Allah....wallahua'lam~ ^_^

A New Start

Bismillahirrahmaanirrahiim...

It has been the longest time since I blogged...longest ever..and I don't know whether this one will ever last too or not...but...we shall see how things goes...insyaAllah I will try my best to keep things updated at all time...huhu..what I'm afraid of the most is loosing the touch ..haha...how can you lose something you never had rite?..so..bear with me people..if there is any.

Why am I blogging again? I dunno myself..but I guess..it's because of the things that had happen or is happening in and about my life...very interesting things indeed...things that made me think and make me wanna story it out...and also...because people around me do blog...haha..I admit it....when I read my friends' blogs, they made me wanna write about all the issues, or stories too...and one last reason is..to improve my English..I've noticed that..since I don't have that many English-speaking friends to talk to, my English have become rusty...yuckkk...I don't even like the way I pronounce any English words too...say that I'm exaggerating...but it's the truth people! Even saying a simple 'thank you' or 'how are you' seems to sound like a very strange things to my ears...aiiyoooo...so...I hope these reasons are good enuff for me to start blogging again...insyaAllah...

and oh..oh...here is the link to my old one...the one that I abandoned more than a year ago..sorry! >>Heart to Speak

until my next post...be good and take care! ^_^